I was getting out of the shower this morning and got a glimpse of some of my scars in the mirror…it made me wince when I saw them…and then…I realized just how beautiful they are. A scar usually occurs with trauma…we aren’t scarred by an awesome day, a wonderful experience, an easy life…we get them when some sort of trauma happens to us…they accompany some bit of agony. Scar tissue is tougher than regular tissue…it is stronger and harder to break through…it is there, where we develop and grow into deeper people.
I have some physical scars from having children. Although I am not thrilled with the scars, It would be a shame to prefer an unmarred body over the souls that were brought into this world through the breaking of my body. I have scars from surgery; those scars remind me of how sick my body used to be and is now, through medical technology and God’s healing, in a much healthier place. It would be a shame to wish away those scars in order to have an unhealthy but unmarred body. Those physical scars have developed strength.
I have emotional scars from things that were done to me in the past. And while I wouldn’t wish those events on anyone, it has helped me to become someone more beautiful through the brokenness. I can bring those hurts to God and he can redeem them into beautiful areas of growth. (I’ll admit that I have to repeatedly go to Him with these scars and ask Him to take them because I tend to snatch the pain back from Him so that I can control it.) I think that deeper scars produce depth if we can allow them to heal properly.
I have emotional scars from things that I have done to others in the past. I have let people down and actively injured others in deep and lasting ways. While I have found forgiveness from those I hurt, God, and myself, those scars are a reminder to think outside of myself and consider others. (In case you are wondering, I don’t believe that there is such a thing as a privately-committed sin…sin ALWAYS moves outward like a domino effect. No matter how privately committed, it will always affect others. That is why it is sin…sin separates us from God…when we are separated from God, we will damage those He loves.)
Here is the thing though…I think (and I have no Biblical reasoning for thinking this) that our scars will be the crowns that we get to honor God with in Heaven. I think that we are a society that is obsessed with perfection and perception. We hide our “issues” from people which leaves us to wallow through them alone. But I think that in heaven, God will turn our thinking on its head. I think our brokenness will be our beauty if we trusted God with it. I think our scars, physical and emotional, will shout to all how God carried us through. How he healed. How we trusted and how He was worthy of that trust. So, I’m taking a good look at myself…at my “damage”…and praising God for it because it allows me to know Him deeper…it allows me to love people well…it allows me to appreciate being brought through the dark places and coming out on the other side better.
This image is a picture of a mosaic created by Sonia King. I think that mosaics show how sometimes, we make beauty out of brokenness.